OPINION: Trends are cringey af.

Okay, you guys may know that I like to talk about how little my faith in humanity — primarily my generation — is. I often don’t partake in trends (except for some lit fashion ones. And no, lit is just another example of a trend I most certainly do NOT get in on.)

One trend came to me whilst on a church mission trip. I was first introduced to the app GroupMe. It’s fun to be a part of those group chats, but I’ll warn you topics get dirty quickly (if that bothers you. I’m not bothered easily. But, like, you’re warned.)

Quickly, the trend vaping was introduced into the chat. That was last summer, and to be honest, I had to google what that was.

Now, I could rant that vaping is a wonderful gateway to real cigarettes, and stronger drugs than nicotine. Even if it doesn’t kill you (Yet. We still don’t know all of the health risks, and mostly we’ve decided that they may kill you … they just won’t kill you quickly.) but you aren’t going to listen. Especially if you are part of #vapenation — feeling the cringe yet?

I’m so tired of today’s trends. I don’t like giant, buglike eyebrows. I don’t like giant lips that look like you just went through anaphylactic shock. I don’t like fake eyelashes, crop tops, contouring, youtube videos about applying foundation with condoms, pink pom pom’s, fake glasses, man buns (unless it’s Sokka’s warrior’s tale … #avatartbt), long fake nails, rose gold, etc., etc., etc.

Does that list make you shudder. Me too. #shook.

Every other discussion we have is about Donald Trump. If he’s so terrible, you should just not focus on things that don’t make you happy (especially if there’s no reason to never stop focusing on him.) “WRONG.”

And can we just talk about dabs. My grandma is still trying to figure out what the hell they are! Like, what are those?

Or what about the Bee Movie like every time BEE they say BEE I will die BEE a little BEE more. BEE BEE BEE BEE BEEEEEEE.

And squads, they’re everywhere. Like marching band, we made the mistake of calling our small group squads. If I never hear “It’s Lit, Fam” again, I may still end up being a happy person.

Trends have always been bad, stupid, shall I say … Dank? I’m sorry if this is terrorizing you. It hurts to write, it. hurts. to. Write.

There’s this guy who was trying to flirt with me over snap chat awhile ago. After sending my STREAKS (let me cover my face and send you this message only because I want the streak and not because I want a human relationship) I opened a chat from him. Not that I was considering dating him before, but I was super turned off at “hey, baby girl.” I’m a strong, independent woman, who hella don’t have a need for you.

But I digress. (Sorry, sorry.)

My point is, have trends always spread like this, infiltrating even our safest learning locations like fidget spinners. And, yes, I had one. But that’s because I actually have anxiety. I’m not using a toy that helps some focus in ridiculous ways, so it can become a distraction for all.

I got my #inspo for this regrettable (no, i won’t say cringe again. I wouldn’t do that to you.) post when we were playing this ridiculous but embarrassingly fun game called paranoia. When one guy got chosen most likely “fidget spin his private parts” I realized just how far this all had gone.

Maybe high school has always been like that. From jeggings to onesies, from neon to space buns, heck even latex clothes! (Thanks, Kim.)

Maybe it’s just because I’ve finally come to the age when trends are really integrated in my age group. Maybe it’s because I’ve finally matured enough to realized that failed orange hair, trying to be viewed as edgy, and wearing black because it’s a ‘cool’ color were bad, embarrassing decisions. Maybe I’m more mature than others my age, even though I still hang out with 6th graders, the boy I like is 13, and I watch Avatar the Last Airbender lowkey like I’m looking for God in it.

To me though, even when my sister was going through high school, it seemed like the trends were not as hardcore as they are now. They were chill. And that was fine to the nines. (No, you haven’t missed a trend. I’ve always said this, I guess it’s my own personal trend. LOL.)

Maybe I may be viewed as out-of-touch by not participating in trends now. Or maybe I’ll be viewed as cool later because I don’t have any embarrassing #nofilter #Iwokeuplikethis #natural selfies later, with makeup that took me hours, a ton of editing to make my lips look fuller, and wearing a prom dress to bed because #whynot.

No revenge photos here.

 

***If you are wondering why so many words are bold or italics, those are the trends. Just to clarify.***

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